Updated: Dec 18, 2019
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Goal setting, believe in your dreams, self worth, how to ignore the naysayers and do what you want anyway
We all have very particular goals in life. Some want to be rich and successful. Others want to do something good for the world. One person might want to become a famous actor. Another might want to buy a house and start a family. Whatever you hope for, it can become an integral part of your life that nobody else can take away from you.
Sometimes though, the difficult people in life might start to niggle at your confidence and make you feel like your dreams are unachievable. Don’t let this happen. All your desires have to come from you and nobody else should make you feel like your wrong to want that. Above all, don’t base your life around pleasing others because your self worth will diminish and life will become meaningless.
Having dreams and working towards them can give you a strong feeling of identity which can in turn boost your confidence. Here are some tips for how to ignore the naysayers and do what you want to do anyway.
Be sure you want the goals your working towards
Dreaming of something and fulfilling that dream require focus and determination. Your success often depends on the extent to which you really want that dream. A good start to realising your dreams is to reflect on yourself. Ask yourself will this make you happy? Will it suit you? Are you only seeking this to accommodate for others’ wishes rather than your own? Once you’re sure that your dreams are your own and the right ones for you your ready to soar into action.
Brushing aside the doubters
Along your way you are sure to encounter people who will doubt your ability. They might talk only of difficulties you are already aware of. They might question your skills or ask if you really want that and not something else. Most of this says more about them than you. A lot of the time people project their own anxieties onto others. When they say something is difficult, it might be true, but you are doing your research and taking time to prepare and work slowly towards your goal. You are taking all the steps necessary and have no reason to fear difficulty. It is important to know the difficulties because then you can find solutions to overcome them. But simply droning on about how difficult your task is won’t help. So don’t let the doubters force you off your path. Helpful advice you can take but negativity should be brushed aside, ensuring none is internalised.
Find the support you need
On the one hand, people will hold you back. Others on the other hand, will propel you on your way. Once you find someone who shares your own enthusiasm for your plans it can be like electricity. Getting excited about something with someone else will feed your creativity and determination to succeed. You can also share tips as well as motivation.
Remain inspired and focused
Sometimes dreams can take a long time to come to fruition. Along the way it is easy to lose focus and get distracted by other life events. It’s fine to get distracted but to remind yourself of your goals you might want to look for sources of inspiration. Find people who have achieved something similar. They might have written about their own experiences along the way that you can read about. They are likely to have faced similar obstacles along the way and you can learn from them how they overcame and dealt with their problems.
People often produce Youtube channels or write blogs to document how the process went for them. It can be important to see someone who you can relate to. You might want to stick a poster on your wall or write a note to remind yourself to keep going. Also, let yourself dream and imagine how it must feel to have achieved what they’ve achieved. It is a good source of motivation to imagine reaching your goals.
Encourage yourself as you would encourage a friend
It can be tiring when nobody else encourages you. If this is the case then you are your best source of encouragement and support. Write a letter to yourself about why and how you will achieve your dreams. Tell yourself you deserve to achieve them. Tell yourself not to give up, to keep going and convince yourself of the success it will be when you finally attain what you want. Put yourself in the place of a friend encouraging you as a different person. This way the right words tend to come easier.
Put in the time
When you really want something, and you set aside a bit of time each week or even each day, eventually you will achieve it. If you want to learn a new skill, practicing it regularly will get you there. If you want to save up to travel the world, put in the hours of work and eventually your savings will build up.
Don’t exhaust yourself
Give yourself breaks too. Otherwise you risk suffering from burnout if it’s the only thing you focus on. Take time to forget your goals altogether and do something fun that will just make you happy. Then you can return to your plans reinvigorated and they are more likely to go successfully.
Whatever your goals are in life good luck and remember to stay confident in yourself! You got this!